Losing focus on our goals and concentrating on the journey instead may help us to achieve our goals more effectively and more enjoyably. Although focusing on goals can be fun and invigorating, it can be a very frustrating process as well. Especially if the goal is far away from where we are, such as retirement, graduation or anything that takes a long time to achieve; focusing on that end state or destination brings out feelings of inadequacy and impatience. Feelings of inadequacy can be good, however, if and when they move us to action. But the action or the “how” before we get to our destination is more important than the actual destination itself, and focusing on the how will help us to get to our destination more effectively and with more satisfaction and joy.
Let’s take the example of a marathon. The finish line is 26.2 miles away. It is going to take us a long time to get there. You need proper equipment (running shoes, water, training, sunglasses, etc.) to arrive at the finish. Focusing on how we get to the finish line will not only ensure that we get there safely (remember that you may have to cross busy intersections with traffic), but also will allow us the chance to enjoy ourselves as we go. The now. Living in the now is the best, stress-free, action that we can take during the marathon. We will meet people along the way during “the how” of the marathon that will help us. We will meet people that need our help. Perhaps in both of these examples, we would overlook these people or not even see them if we were only focusing on arriving at our destination. The trouble is that we may not even finish the marathon without their help, and they may not even finish the marathon without our help. Focusing on the how of the marathon and taking every step seriously right now helps us to cross that finish line, in the future. But focusing on the future does not guarantee success because we may trip, fall, or get delayed by negative thinking because the finish line is just too far away from us.
Concentrating on what you are doing every step of the marathon also makes the marathon more palatable and bearable. Every step that you take during the marathon is one step closer to the finish line. This balance between thinking about the finish line, but at the same time concentrating on the next step (so that you don’t twist your ankle and get injured) is something that we all need to think about from time to time, and practice. Concentrating on the how takes practice and concentration, because we tend to want to get to our destinations quickly. We have grown to be inpatient and bored because of the pace of our lives. It is up to us to slow down, concentrate on the journey, and enjoy the ride. We will finish the marathon soon enough. And then what? Another marathon? Sure.
Let’s develop some practical ways to focus on the how of something so that we may live better and happier in the now. We now what these ways are already. We just have to think about them. The next time that we go on a walk or a drive, we need to pay attention to every detail that we see and focus on those things. If we are walking, let’s feel the ground beneath our feet. Let’s take in the smells and sounds around us. Birds singing? Try and imagine what it must be like to be a bird, flying through the air. What would that look like? How many colors do we see? Differentiate between the various plants that we see. How long does each take to grow? Focusing on the details along the way and not on how long we have to go or how far we have to go will force us to focus on the present moment. Practice this and see how we feel at the end of the walk. It takes a lot of concentration to focus on the how of our actions instead of the destination. The key is to focus on what is around us and what our body is doing right in the moment. Thinking too far ahead takes us away from that simple action of the how and the now.
Try and develop this in everything that you do. What other activities or actions do you perform where you overly focus on the end instead of focusing on the journey? Can you apply similar principles from the walk example to those? Experiment with this for a few days and see if you are getting more satisfaction out of your how, and less dissatisfaction at not having arrived at the finish line yet.
Dr. N